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Common Screenwriting Mistakes… Part 2

Action Lines…

Avoid internal thought whenever possible. We can’t see this happening. We do not want to create a ‘dejected look’ in our minds for your character. Reveal this change of emotion through an actual action and dialogue.

The general rule is… If you can’t actually shoot it, LEAVE IT OUT. If you feel that there’s something internal we absolutely must know, you need to figure out a way to present it to us visually, through dialogue, or both.

Keep direction of your characters to an absolute minimum. There’s no need to tell us every facial gesture, body movement, etc… Leave something for the actors to do!

If you’ve already got it in the scene heading, no need to repeat it in an action line.

Stay away from all the ‘we see’ and ‘we hear’ description (in your SPEC). Just describe it as it is.

Ever heard of SPELL CHECK? You’d be surprised at how many people forget they even have it. You’d also be surprised at how many readers be they producers, directors, actors, agents, and actual readers consider this a pet peeve of theirs. Would a house painter leave the trim unpainted? Would a mechanic leave out the sparkplugs after he does a tune-up on your car? Using spell check will catch the majority of your misspellings but even then, there are always those typos that you have to find by actually reading through. One of my own problems is using “know” when I should have used “no.” I usually find at least 2 of these in my first drafts but I can only find them by reading through the entire screenplay.

. Passive voice is WEAK. Active voice is STRONG. Enough said.

. Does your character walk, run, jump, open, and close when he or she could dart, speed, leap, burst, and slam? Choose the appropriate verb for the appropriate action.

Action paragraphs. Try to keep them down to 3 or 4 lines instead of going on and on and on. Readers love white space… In fact, almost every professional I know will flip through a script to see how much white space is there. They know the more white space, the faster the read and hopefully, an enjoyable read.

Character consistency… Be sure to let us know what characters are in a location when you write that passage… Don’t just pop a character in there that we didn’t know was there to begin with unless you give them some kind of entrance… Too confusing and bogs down the reading.

Flashbacks…

If you absolutely must use them, learn how to properly format them. BEGIN FLASHBACK, then a blank line… Describe the flashback with as few action lines as possible and then another blank line and end the flashback with END FLASHBACK. Then ONLY use a flashback when it is absolutely important and critical to the story… Generally, if there’s a different way to reveal the same information, it is better to do so.

Clichés…

I know we all think in clichés but wow… They really bog down the reading of a screenplay. Make your characters real by creating backstory on them. Don’t simply copy what you’ve seen in the movies already. We want authentic characters not the same characters we saw in some other movie. They were fine for that other movie… Not in yours. Same goes for cliché locations, descriptions, and dialogue. Be different. Be ORIGINAL. Create the new cliché that everybody else ends up copying!

Which brings me back to distinctness… Make every character distinctly different from all the other characters in your screenplay.

Conflict…

Do you get along with everybody? Sure, we all try but let’s face it… We don’t. So why does everyone get along in your screenplay? Create conflict whenever possible. That’s what we want to see. We don’t go to the movies to see our own daily lives… We want to live vicariously through the characters you’ve created for us so take us on a wild ride!

Contrast…

Contrast your characters… Make them obviously different from one another. We’ll immediately see it and you’ll hook us into the story just a bit more…

Get a life…

Do you have a life? Do your friends? Your associates? Then be nice and give your character a life too! LOL. Seriously, a lot of characters in screenplays I read seem like they have no life other than what they’ve created in their own minds. Boring. Show us how they interact with people. Show us how they work, where they work, who they work with… Do they have a hobby? Do they do something other than talk? Show us. I was recently DRAGGED to . I was pleasantly surprised by the movie… Lots of conflict and the main character had quite a full life. Scenes took place on a yacht, rock climbing, surfing, etc… The characters had lives!

Know your character…

It’s not enough to know when your characters were born… What their current job is. How well do you know your friends and family? You should know your characters AT LEAST as well as you know your friends and family. Probably BETTER. Just like you would probably know your brother’s reaction to something, so should you know your character’s reaction to the same thing. Create backstory on them with complete details since they were born. You may never actually use any of this information in your screenplay but you’ll go a long way towards KNOWING your characters and making them authentic. Know them as well as you know anyone and we will see an authentic character that doesn’t bore us.

Change…

Make your characters change by the end of your story… This is usually called your character’s ARC. There’s a lot of people who say they DESPISE the character arc of a movie character. There’s a lot of bloggers who are very fast to point out all the movies in history where the character had no character arc… Good for them but we’re trying to write and sell spec screenplays…

The easiest way to show change in a character is to go in the completely opposite direction from where the character originates… Think transformation. If your character is sad, make him happy. If she’s dishonest, make her honest. Opposites are fairly easy to develop so work it in. There are of course other types of internal change… Just remember that we’re talking about some kind of internal growth or change however subtle. It doesn’t have to be opposite. Just make sure your character changes… If you’re writing a tragedy, this is a little more difficult but generally speaking you can still work by going in the opposite direction… Start out happy, end in sadness.

Unk



Friday: 7 July 2006|1757|Under Mistakes

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9 Responses to “Common Screenwriting Mistakes… Part 2”

  1. wcdixon on Friday: 7 July 2006|2117

    Hmmm…I tend to use ‘we see’ or ‘we hear’ a lot, but probably because I’ve been produced a lot while on tv series and know its going to get shot and so therefore expect to see it or hear it….but for the spec could see avoiding it.

    And have worked very hard in past several years to write in active voice/active verbs…but have to reread and check and always am amazed at how many passive words I’ll still use without realizing it. Sigh.

    I’d also love to look at any good pdf scripts you might be sending to Movie Quill, but up to you.

    dixwilson1031@hotmail.com

    Thanks.

  2. Unknown Screenwriter on Friday: 7 July 2006|2229

    Hey no problem… Will send you some that I think really help define the art…

    You’re right… Once you’re produced, no problem using “We see” –but even then, using it all through the screenplay gets a little weary.

    I go ahead and use it for my first draft i.e., I write whatever comes to my mind… Even ON-THE-NOSE dialogue… Whatever it takes to get that fucking first draft out of me. Then I make a pass on all this stuff.

    Screenplays COMING!

    Unk

  3. Mystery Man on Saturday: 8 July 2006|0719

    Hey guys,

    I just wanted to say “hello.” I’m a new kid on the block and I’ve always enjoyed this blog.

    http://mysterymanonfilm.blogspot.com/

    -MM

  4. The Moviequill on Saturday: 8 July 2006|0745

    just a quick note to thank you for the wonderful scripts you sent (yes there is a reason I am on my knees before you… unless you want your shoes shined?). I will read EVERY one, I promise… thanks, my good man

  5. Unknown Screenwriter on Saturday: 8 July 2006|1157

    Mystery Man: Welcome! Looks like I’m not the only Unknown Screenwriter… LOL.

    MovieQuill: I’m barefoot right now but my favorite beer is MOOSEHEAD. Hint – hint.

    Unk

  6. The Moviequill on Saturday: 8 July 2006|1435

    hmmm, I write barefoot too (we have that in common), Moosehead is from Canada which I am from originally (another commanality)… West Coast, BC area and you like jazz?

  7. Unknown Screenwriter on Saturday: 8 July 2006|1524

    Right… Read that in your blog (being from Canada). I’m a Moosehead drinker from way back… Jazz is good but to be honest, I don’t get to listen to much music these days… I wake up — I write. I go to sleep — I write. LOL. About my only indulgence these days WAS the SOPRANOS, now DEADWOOD. I can rarely even watch a DVD anymore without getting out my DVD remote and a stack of notecards and breaking down a movie but you know what? I still enjoy it. Especially when I find something I haven’t seen before which is RARE.

    Unk

  8. Chris J. Scurria on Wednesday: 15 October 2008|0208

    Whoa, Moviequill.

    Well, to Unk. Spellcheck is good. . . but some overuse it. It can probably generate why kids and
    students who may or may not have hobbies turn in
    papers so quick. “I don’t need to spell or use grammar, The Spellcheck will do it for me.”

    No names but one kid was joking around and found a long word for I think “sad” on the compu program at school years back. He put in laughing. He later got it crossed out by the teacher.

    Dictionary; a GREAT IDEA.
    Spellcheck. . . noooo.

    DID ANYONE READ That was then, This is Now by
    S. E. Hinton?
    It is tragic. . . but in a way one wouldn’t assume. Good writer.

    “I recite my verses forthe king; My tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.” -Psalm. Bible.

    –The HOLY ONE> not those guides :)

  9. Chris J. Scurria on Wednesday: 15 October 2008|0214

    Character sketch:
    One draws out the “people” on paper.
    EXAMPLE:
    Joe Thompson
    -Pleasant and writes.
    -Calm and does not usually get angry.
    -Some describe him as “{Peaceful)”

    They help a writing a LOT.
    Also with subplot

    “Blessed are the peacemakers for they are the children of God.” -F. Pres. Jimmy Carter quoting Holy Bible.

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